The headline pretty much says it all, right?
When we first gave my son a cell phone he could care less. In fact, it was a constant source of contention for the first year or so. He either (1) failed to turn the phone on; (2) failed to charge the phone so it couldn’t be turned on; (3) turned the volume off so calls could not be heard and; (4) never checked his messages. Needless to say, there were a few heated conversations about points 1 through 4 …
But now that he’s in high school, his phone is a constant companion. Buzzing non-stop with urgent new text messages like “hi” and “wassup” and “:)” …
And each time I hear “bzzzz bzzzz” all I see are dollar signs. His high school girlfriend – and girl friends – are killing my phone plan. One smiley face text at a time …
So is it unreasonable for a mother to request that her son reconcile with his girlfriend from last year? The one who rarely, if ever, sent text messages. I liked that girl. She had respect for our phone plan …
This whole phone plan thing has me thinking that, as the plan’s owner – and payer – wouldn’t it then be acceptable to pre-screen potential girlfriends to determine their text habits. You know, to first make sure she complies with our text plan parameters? A little multiple choice questionnaire that could go something like ..
1. What kind of text plan do you have?
a. unlimited
b. 800 texts/month
c. 400 texts/month
d. 200 texts/month (= I’m planning the wedding)
2. On average, how often would you say you send smiley face or winky face or mouth with a big O face or face with a big D smile texts – or any kind of face-only texts?
a. Multiple times a day
b. Once a day
c. A few times a day
D. Never (= what color for the bridesmaid dresses?)
3. On average, how many texts do you send on any given day?
a. >100
b. 50-100
c. 25-50
d. 10-25
e. <10 (= fish or chicken or both?)
4. Please circle all that apply. “I text because …”
a. I’m bored
b. I have questions about my homework and assignment (= what kind of flowers do you like?)
c. I’m meeting up with friends and we need to coordinate times/places (= I see a few movie dates in your future)
d. I need to keep my mom and dad updated on my whereabouts (= do you prefer a spring, summer, fall, or winter wedding?)
That seems fair, right? Reasonable, no?
*sigh*
I’m just going to have to suck it up and pay for the unlimited text plan, won’t I?
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